I am the only child of my parents. As a result of that, there was so much pressure on me from my mother to get married quite early after I graduated from the University.

 

I met my wife in one of the pentecostal churches where I worship. She was a very good friend of mine, ever ready to assist me anytime I needed it. She even introduced me to her cousin who helped me secure my present job. I proposed to her & finally, we got married.

 

Three years after marriage, no child of our own. My mother is on my neck. Though we have been praying, I also suggested to my wife that we go for medical check up & she agreed to that.

 

After going through several medical checks, the doctor confirmed that she may not likely have a child because her womb is damaged. I starred at my wife in surprise & shock but decided to keep my cool.

 

When we got home, I demanded for further explanations. With tears rolling down her cheeks, she told me that she was sexually abused by her step brother while she was in secondary school. When it was discovered that she was pregnant, her mother took her to procure abortion to save the family from shame. She never knew that her womb was affected.

 

If I tell my mother, she would be mad & wont hesitate a second to throw her out. My church has zero tolerance for divorce & wont agree to that. If I decide to keep quiet, for how long will I do that.

 

I am currently in a fix. Please what do I do.

32 COMMENTS

  1. Did you marry her just to make babies for you, or did you marry her because your parents were on your neck to get married, or did you marry her because you love her?? These are the questions you will have to ask your self. If you really married her because you love her, divorce shouldn’t be an option, look unto God and forget what people or your parents will say. Then also talk to your spiritual authority

  2. you dont throw a woman out simply becos she cant concive.it has to be for adultery only.No man wil ever claim such a situation as his portion,but we stil see faithful christian men experiencing such crisis in marriage.I believe that God is the one that allows,us to walk into calamities while the devil turns our minds over to destruction through the decision he makes us take.For christian women dat,say such thins asrape is not their portion yet they experience it,its becos God alowed it.So the couple should mov ahead…However women hardly ever tell a man thetruth they should know about them.

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  5. U marry her for better and for worce. Face that thing and be support to ur wife. There still be milions of parentless children. Take one or two and raise them with love like ur own.

    If it will be Gods wille, ur wife will still get pregnant for u. If not, be greatful for all other blessing He gave u, cos u still have health, life, place to live, food to eat and wife that loves u.

  6. Don’t walk away keep trusting God.Its not easy but possible. God has a spare womb in His store,He will repair the damaged womb of your wife. Ur wife needs to go to God in prayers for forgiveness and mercy. U will have a testimony soon

  7. Be patient and prayerful… Ive seen where a woman with no womb gave birth in CPM lagos. Their faith saw them through. Afterall the reason for marriage isnt just about child bearing But companionship etc! Adopting Kids wont really be a bad idea…. But in all HAVE FAITH AND WATCH GOD PROVE PEOPLE/DOCTORS WRONG

  8. She is your wife. The important thing is that you love yourselves, you should not allow your mother to bring problem in your marriage. Do you believe in God? Do you know that God has spare part to any part of the body? This is a time the two of you should hold unto God in prayer, there is nothing God cannot do! Moreover, another option to having a child is through adoption. Many couples have adopted children and are living happily. Please leave your mother out of this!

  9. Amaka Uniquelove Anietie Beloved, i didn’t get the details of this story, but the comments i read, i understand that is about child bearing, he don’t have to divorce his wife because of child, children are gift from God, psalm 127 verse 3 says, lo, children are an heritage of the lord, and the fruit of the womb is his reward, where is his faith as a christain? People don’t divorce thisdays because of child, i know some men of God that has such problem adopted a child as many as they can, if he is in a haste, let him discusse it with her wife they can adopt a child:

  10. Trust God for a miracle. I’ve witnessed in RCCG camp, a testimony concerning a woman who doesn’t hv a womb, was prayed for, later conceived, gave birth to a baby in due time $ after 15 days or so, it was dscovered dat der was yet anothr baby which she gave birth to; AFTER days of gvn birth. This is d level of miracle power our God possess. He is a God of new begining, He is able to create a new womb for ur wife. Just trust Him while waitn for His time. That power dat made Him Lord, May God prove it upon ur wife in Jesus name, Amen. Its well wt u all

  11. Dear friend your story is so touchy… Firstly, know everything is possible with God. Secondly, know that God will readily fix ur wife womb because with ur narration, she was ignorant of the deed. Then on what you should do, know that marriage is not all about bearing of kids. Keep being the husband of ur wife and keep watching and holding faith with the Lord But, if u think u can no longer wait on the Lord because of the pressure from your people, relocate from your current base if u are closer to them then go adopt a new born baby then break the news to them that ur wife have given birth while you still continue waiting on the lord. Dont leave your wife because she has been ur destiny helper and this is ur time too to be her destiny helper. I assure you in no distant time God will prove Himself in ur marriage if u respect His binding law of marriage. Goodluck!

  12. The truth is that the young man is in a difficult situation. Being the only child, one of reasons why his parents wanted him to get a wife so early is for him to have not just a child but children. For the children not to be forthcoming is a very big trauma. The question is would this young man have gone ahead to marry the wife if he had known of the wife’s condition before the marriage? An honest answer to that question should direct him on what choice to make.

    #strictlypersonalopinion

    • It’s up to him. If he would have married her if he had known about her condition before marriage, let him exercise faith, keep on loving his wife & put on his shock absorber against pressure from family members. If God wills, he may do something about their condition.
      On the other hand, if he knows he wouldn’t have continued with the marriage & that his faith cannot carry him, let him talk it over with the wife & exercise possible options.
      There is a difference between a situation where there is no known medical condition/the medical condition isn’t the fault of any party & the condition is a clear negligence on the part of a party.

    • They said that the most important or. Primary thing in marriage is the companionship. That child bearing is secondary. What do you have to say?

    • Love & companionship are good & very important but at the same you have to also consider side by side the man’s peculiar situation as the only hope of continuity in the family.

    • They said that in marriage, third party should not be allowed, so why involving the consent of his family, if they will adopt?

    • In the traditional African society, certain marital issues are not strictly between the couple because of the extended family system. Therefore the statement that third parties are not involved does not apply strictly but qualified. Marriage does not isolate you from your family.

    • In a situation, where the family did not support adoption and the man loves his wife so much that he cannot do without her. What will happen?

    • The man should discuss it with his family to understand their fears & try as much as possible to allay those fears. If it’s a spiritual issue where the family ancestors may have entered into any form of covenant that forbids a member of the family to adopt, he should deal with that spiritually first. Otherwise, he should make them see reasons with him, make necessary consultations & where they insist, he can go ahead with his plans & face the consequences.

  13. am touched with the story. since the man is a born again christain, there is still a way out. let him first of all 4give his wife, i know some men will find it very hard 2 do. he should not allow his parents to pressurize on getn a 2nd wife or pushing his wife away. instead of the let them go 4 adoption without even consulting the both parents.

  14. Its not easy getting married to an only son,der will be so much pressure on d man,d wife gets it more.i am a pratical example,it took a while for us,but today we have three children to d Glory of God.we cried to God and he heard us.pray works

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